All been to my dads for lunch today I haven`t seen him for a bit he`s lost weight 2 and a half stone he was told he needed to loose 4 stone he was 16 stone then and 13 half now he looks really well allot of the fat in his face has gone only has the one chin now lol also his waist he`s dropped a size trousers really chuffed with himself good on him .
my step sister was their fallen out with her boyfriend she asked him how many people he`d had sex with he was honest told her more than 20 he is 19 she`s 17 and has had sex with 7 people she is also expecting a baby in September so her hormones are more than likely kicking in but she thinks he`s shagging other people i don't think he would .
Ben told my dad a joke that made him nearly wet himself .
man buys a northern budgie ``its a talking bird by the way''
budgie says am a northern bird am ROCK HARD . 24 hours a day
so its owner says I gonna teach that bird a lesson he buys another budgie twice as big as him puts him in the cage goes to bed .
next morning he has a look in the cage big budgie `s on the floor and little one sat on his swing and says am a northern budgie I am ROCK HARD .
guy goes shopping again brings back two of the hardest birds he could find puts them in the cage
next morning he looks and they both dead budgie sat on his swing am a northern budgie me ROCK HARD .
the guy spends days trying to find a harder fighting bird
he finds an American balled eagle on the Internet greatest fighters ever so he orders one .
a week later it arrives had to feed it whole chickens a watched it rip it to shreds so he thinks yep he`s ready
he puts it in the cage with the budgie goes to bed during the night theirs a hell of a racket from the cage from both birds he gets up next morning to find the cage smashed in pieces the floor cover in budgie feathers as well as eagle feathers the eagle is shaking in the corner covered in blood
the budgie is sat at the window shakes his head and says well I had to take my coat of to that one but I think we came to an understanding
my step sister was their fallen out with her boyfriend she asked him how many people he`d had sex with he was honest told her more than 20 he is 19 she`s 17 and has had sex with 7 people she is also expecting a baby in September so her hormones are more than likely kicking in but she thinks he`s shagging other people i don't think he would .
Ben told my dad a joke that made him nearly wet himself .
man buys a northern budgie ``its a talking bird by the way''
budgie says am a northern bird am ROCK HARD . 24 hours a day
so its owner says I gonna teach that bird a lesson he buys another budgie twice as big as him puts him in the cage goes to bed .
next morning he has a look in the cage big budgie `s on the floor and little one sat on his swing and says am a northern budgie I am ROCK HARD .
guy goes shopping again brings back two of the hardest birds he could find puts them in the cage
next morning he looks and they both dead budgie sat on his swing am a northern budgie me ROCK HARD .
the guy spends days trying to find a harder fighting bird
he finds an American balled eagle on the Internet greatest fighters ever so he orders one .
a week later it arrives had to feed it whole chickens a watched it rip it to shreds so he thinks yep he`s ready
he puts it in the cage with the budgie goes to bed during the night theirs a hell of a racket from the cage from both birds he gets up next morning to find the cage smashed in pieces the floor cover in budgie feathers as well as eagle feathers the eagle is shaking in the corner covered in blood
the budgie is sat at the window shakes his head and says well I had to take my coat of to that one but I think we came to an understanding
Hello Lee
ReplyDeleteGood to know that your dad's doing well healthwise - he's obviously got more willpower than me about losing weight!
Love & best wishes
Sammy B
It's great your dad is losing weight! He'll be a lot healthier because of it.
ReplyDeleteAnd the joke is toooooo funny!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Peace <3
Jay
Funny. By the way, how much is a 'stone'.
ReplyDeleteNeat story!
ReplyDeleteHa Ha good Joke. Glad your Old Man is getting better. And STORYMAN a stone is 14 pounds in weight I know that because in the restaurant thats how they weigh potatoes
ReplyDeletestone is 14lbs or 6.35 kg
ReplyDeleteso dad lost 35lbs in total or nearly 13 kg really proud of him he`s had to cut his hours a bit but he`s cashed in some policy`s he had .
Good for your Dad! That's a lot of weight to lose in such a short time. I have lost 7 kilos, but I can't seen to lose any more, despite my daily gym workout!
ReplyDeleteR
2 half stone in about 3 months is good going I admit and dad has said himself that he needs to slow it down a bit .
ReplyDelete